作者  triste (熊哥,你回來了嗎?)                                 看板  CATCH
 標題  Re: [請益] 走不出來淡不掉
 時間  Tue Oct 10 23:48:04 2006
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我曾經很愛過一個女人。
                                                                               
在二十幾年內時光,沒有任何其他女朋友得到我對他的二分之一用心過。
                                                                               
夠愛了吧?!
                                                                               
                                                                               
但是,她始終覺得,我不夠愛她。
                                                                               
                                                                               
只要她說來她希望的,我都會盡力實現。
                                                                               
可是我不再會像一開始的時候,主動給他驚喜,主動帶給她體貼,主動想對她更好。
                                                                               
更白一點,她說我才配合,她不說我樂的輕鬆的鬼樣子讓她懷疑『我愛你』
                   而我,卻總是理直氣狀的訴說著『不愛你又怎會甘願配合你?』
                                                                               
失去她之後,我才了解。

被動,給女人的真切感覺,就是抽象的『心沒有放在他身上。』

不過,這段感情有遺憾卻沒有悔恨。
                                                                               
兩人沒有對錯,只是我們的愛,名詞解釋不同。
                                                                               
                                                                               
俗一點用數字來說
                                                                               
男孩的愛滿分是六十。女孩的愛滿分是一百。
                                                                               
兩個人對彼此用心相愛。
                                                                               
女孩一定會氣憤,全心付出的她,為何只得到男孩用剛及格的愛去面對她。
                                                                               
但在男孩的價值裡,他早已經豁盡他自己的全力了。
       還有一大生氣原因是男孩追求的時候做得到一百分,交往一兩年卻做不到了......
                                                                               
                                                                               
其實真相很簡單.....=.=
                                                                               
我追女孩的時候,整個人,為她生,為她死。

腦海中想的全是她的一言一行,
                                                                               
閱讀的資訊全部都是她的生活裡會感興趣的。
                                                                               
走在街上逛街任何事物都會聯想到她會不會喜歡。
                                                                               
                                                                               
她,就是我的世界中心,我全心全意讓她和我相處開心,再做不到一百分我就是王八了。

                                                                               
男板友常常對我兩個星期內就追到手的功力,感到羨慕。
                                                                               
今天剛好大方讓你知道,光鮮亮麗的背後痛苦在哪兒。
                                                                               
不是兩個星期內追到利害,而是這樣的燃燒超過三個月,你會完全失去自己。
 
                                                                                                               
                                                                               
                                                                               
失去自己是不會快樂的,不會快樂的感情,又能夠延續多久?
                                                                               
                                                                               
所以我燃燒得了兩三個月的一百分,燃燒不了兩三年。
                                                                               
燃燒不了的時候,朋友,家人,工作,一件一件事情讓我分心。
                                                                               
把放在她身上的心,愈分愈少。
                                                                               
                                                                               
終於回到我這個人,本身對愛情的價值觀跟定位了。
                                                                               
愛情在我生命裡,滿分就是六十。
                                                                               
於是,一百分的女孩和原po一樣傷心難過,六十分的男孩ㄍ一ㄥ得很勉強。
                                                                               
                                                                               
隨便愛可能拿三十,努力去愛可以拿六十,痛苦去愛可以拿一百。
                                                                                
             我終究不願意失去自己而愛。
                                                                               
不願意的代價:手放開。
                                                                               
                                                                               
人們總說『別以為他愛你,就會為你而改變。』

有形的習慣行為真的都好改。真正難改的就是這種無形的價值觀。


                                                                               
或許..
                                                                               
一百分的有一天會學會讓自己更容易滿足一點。
                                                                               
六十分的有一天會學會勉強自己更積極一點。
                                                                               
就會有一段八十分的美好。
                                                                               
                                                                               
或許..
                                                                               
兩個六十分的男女相愛才會快樂。
                            
兩個一百分的男女相愛才會幸福。
                                                                               
                                                                               
或許..
                                                                               
人生哪來那麼多的或許?
                                                                               
還能高歌的時候,就大聲歡唱。
                                                                               
還深愛對方的時候,就咬緊牙關。
                                                                               
承受不住的時候,就勇敢停損。
                                                                               
                                                                               
面對沒有唯一解的難題,
                                                                               
別再管『值不值得』『傻不傻』『笨不笨』,
                                                                               
做你真心想要做的事最重要。

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其實我覺得這篇寫的真的超級好
                                                                               
很多人分手的原因都跟他寫的一樣
                                                                               
女生,是交往後,對你的付出才會從60分變成100分
                                                                               
可是男人只要60分就夠了,多付出的都變成負擔;
                                                                               
男生,是交往後,對妳的付出從100分變成60分
                                                                               
可是女人已經被100分寵壞了,怎麼能夠習慣這種改變?
                                                                               
最後經過很多次的摩擦,兩個人都不願意改變自己,就分手了
                                                                               
如同熊哥所說
                                                                               
                                                                               
面對沒有唯一解的難題,
                                                                               
別再管『值不值得』『傻不傻』『笨不笨』,

做你真心想要做的事最重要。
                                                             
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